ADOPTION

I want to adopt one kid one day, full stop.

RANDOM NOTES TO MYSELF !!!!!

The sunlight claps the earth
And the moonbeams kiss the sea
What are all these kissings worth
If thou kiss not me?

P. B. Shelly

Entre nous

Past few days have been very tough. My libido is on a rise, reaching new heights. Men have always been my Achille’s heels. It is something which I am aware of, but I can’t do anything about it. Strangely enough, I always had salacious, often lewd feelings to strangers while good looking colleagues of mine fail to make any impact. Familiarity breeds contempt, does it?. Bizarre tastes don’t end there. I would drool over an ordinary person with a sweet smile than a model hunk.

Laments of a solitary swallow

Am I Afraid of the Dark? Yes, I am. Every night I find myself in my room all alone. Barring from attending a few sporadic phone calls in the night I have nothing else to do. Earlier I used to consider solitude as bliss, not any longer. Why is it that I have an ocean of love deep inside me waiting to shower on a person who deserve, still have to kiss my pillow every single night?

Thy beauty shall no more be found,

Nor, in thy marble vault, shall sound

My echoing song; then worms shall try

That long preserved virginity,

And your quaint honour turn to dust,

And into ashes all my lust.

The grave's a fine and private place,

But none I think do there embrace.

To his coy mistress by Andrew Marvel

LETTER TO A MAN!!!!

Close encounters of the GAY kind

But my secret lies hidden within me
No-one shall discover my name!
Oh no, I will only reveal it on your lips

When daylight shines forth!

Pavarotti Luciano in Nessun Dorma

A typical “encounter” of the “not so straight” kind begins in orkut or in chat rooms. Usually it begins by asking “asl”. I can understand “a” and “l” but I could never figure out the need for “s” in a gay chat room. Ground breaking, isn’t it?? (What is he thinking? :p). Once “asl” is divulged, obviously next question will be any one these i) Your stats plz ii) You t/b? iii) Your likes?( I like songs, will you sing for me? :p) iv) Can i see your photo? v) Can I have your number (dial 100 for police, they'll run to you) vi) Do you have place? (Oh yeh, I am a real estate agent) vii) When can we meet? Am I being interrogated by FBI or Interpol for espionage? Is it that hard to find someone who asks you when your birthday is or what did you have for lunch or how your day was or did you see yesterdays match.

Claims by these fellas can be equally intriguing as well, I am good-looking/ cute/handsome, I am a virgin (a sequel to the movie 40 year old virgin? :o), I am down to earth (or is it downtrodden), We are so similar or I am just like you (probably we were identical twins last birth :o), then finally the bombshell, I love you. I laugh “You guys are the same”. The funniest thing is that when you meet the same guy after a week he will again ask you “asl” and cycle repeats. But rarely, you do meet a bunch of nice people who think beyond the clichéd questions and become friendly and close, for they say every cloud has a silver lining after all. But can one swallow make a summer? May be, may be not.

Epilogue

My Mask too fine and serene,
My smile ugly, words worthless
The mask is torn to pieces
Still I wear a self conscious laugh….

Nanditha

Now i pronounce you husband and ............

People throw stones, you turn them into milestones

Sachin Tendulkar

Ever since the landmark verdict by Delhi High court on I have been asked many times – “Adithya, What do you think of gay marriage?” This question was always somewhere round the corner and I prepared myself with two answers – One for the “straight” kind and other for “not so straight” kind. I sincerely do hope, dream and pray for that day will come when I can give only one, and not two answer.

My answer to the straight kind was- “To live with a man or to live with a woman is a personal choice (By the way, being gay isn’t a personal choice as many of us are born “this” way). Many prefer to stay single, some chose to live together with a man or a woman, some may adopt a kid and remain as single father/mother. They need not offer the society an explanation. They have every right and freedom to do so. Its okay if world doesn’t support gay marriage, but let us not watch them with contempt or disdain. Lets not ridicule them for standing up for their rights. Every one has a dream, pursuing those gives them strength, hope and courage. a dream that makes them confident, which gives them something to aspire for, a passion to live for. Since it doesn’t cause any harm to others, I would certainly support gay marriage. Live and let others live.”

Answer to my gay friends was- “I am gay and I am proud of it. Being a gay is much beyond sex. One day will come when the word “gay” cease to be an epitome of libido, beacon of promiscuous, transient relationships. Happiness leaps no bounds when you spend the time with a person whom you love honestly. Gay marriage to me is something so special, something truly magical which words fail to express.”

Epilogue

“I’m in favour of gay marriage. If two people love each other, and they have a real commitment, of course they should be able to get married. It’s so obvious. … With all the things to worry about in the world at the moment, I can’t understand why something as harmless as gay marriage has become the hot issue.”
Ronan Keating, Gay Times, May 2004

I, ME AND MYSELF

All glory comes from daring to begin.

Eugene F. Ware

It is customary for a blog to begin with introducing oneself, even amidst this clandestine circle which indeed is a big irony. “About me”- I always and invariably struggled to put across myself “in words” before others and quite often I used famous quotations to confront that situation.

I am Adithya who hails from a small town in south India. Let me begin in chronological order. He grew up as a son to wonderful parents and soon became an elder brother too. Life was so merry and playful then. Books and School consumed his days. While growing up he released that unlike most (if not all) of his friends he had no feelings towards the opposite sex. He couldn’t quite figure out the reason but neither did try to contemplate over the issue. He loved to watch his male friends play. The term “gay” was unfamiliar to him until one day his English Teacher taught him “Daffodils” by William Wordsworth. She read aloud
“A poet could not but be gay,
In such a jocund company”.
She said the word gay means happy. He said to himself “I am gay, I am happy”. He didnt realize then, the ramifications innocent words. Thirteen years since, even today he says the same, with an added line. “I am gay, I am proud and I am happy”.

Gallant men, Chivalrous youth and Hunks, I present before thee “closeted memoirs”, my humble venture.